Getting Married in December 2014

Mark and I are finally tying the knot in December in Dominica. Lots of folks came to know late about my engagement because I do not have an engagement ring – I had specifically told Mark I do not want one, well, because 1) I dislike blings 2) I don’t find the significance of having an engagement ring well-justified if we will both be wearing our wedding bands later.

This apparently seems to be not well-accepted amongst the people I know.

I’ve heard many say that I should get an engagement ring to “value” myself, or as a token of “appreciation” from the other party. And others say this is especially true if my other half has a stable and is financially well-to-do.

I find that absolutely baloney. We both love each other, and have been working towards marriage since the inception of our relationship. Marriage is expected and we both have finally reached the stage where we are 100% sure and certain we have found “the one”. So why bother securitizing the relationship with an asset? This is no longer a valuation game. I am comfortable not having an engagement ring, and we are spending enough as-is getting married + honeymoon, so why don’t we skip the part I don’t care about and invest in other things, like a vacation together?

Memories are priceless, a diamond is abso-fucking-lutely not.

And to be fair, he is so uncomfortable with not proposing with anything that he did get me an engagement watch, a symbolic meaning of our “timeless” love and something I could wear forever.

I don’t really know what I am missing.. The violent opposition from people around me had threw me back a little. (I’m not talking naggings, but VICIOUS OPPOSITIONS; debate after debate, over the course of weeks, from friends, colleagues, acquaintances. It’s quite ridiculous really.) It did make me question myself – I am only human and am affected by what others think as well.. especially if they are people I care about. But after writing this post, i am glad I feel grounded once again.. Our relationship is unique, and we will define it however we want, as long as it makes us happy.

Can’t wait for December to come. 🙂